Pain

You have caused me nothing but pain. Yet I still stay by your side.
You have made me do nothing but cry. Yet I still stay by your side.
You made me feel ugly and stupid. You looked down on me. STILL, I stayed by your side.

What more do you want?

Nevermind, I'll leave you alone. You bastard.

Misery forever,
Sweetened Misery.

10th post

HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAH

comments

OI, WHY NO COMMENTS? Haiszer.

MENDAK MENDAK MENDAK. THIS IS WHERE I CAN FUCKING RELEASE THE DEMONS AND MY INSANITY AND WHERE I CAN MAKE TYPOS ON PURPOSE. HAHAHAHHHAHHAHAHA.....................I hate this.

WAH EWAH EWAH

Mmmmmts mmmmmts mmmmts mmmmts washoom. His head looks like a chocolate truffle. His specs make him look kinda froggish. OMG I'm so mean XD

Hey reader(s), pardon my insanity. But can you blame me? Nobody cares. Nobody cares that I love someone so much but that someone doesn't give a shit. That someone just stomps on my heart like it's an ant.

FUCK THAT SHIT. I WISH I WAS HAPPY )':

lalalalalalalalalalelmosworld

In my own world, I will be FUCKING CRAZY A;Oeghewa: ojSLKVTFAlkuEHGspouJ

Oh, hi *waves* Never realised that anybody read this thing. Heh. K BYE

Haiszer RANDOM

LANGGAM AWANG SELAMPIT, RENTAK SAWAN BERTUBI-TUBI. JELAS DI LILIT API, MATA MENJALANG MENGHUNUS SEPI.
MADA KUNO MUMUR CALAK HATI. CANDA PULA MENGUNDANG BERAHI. MADANG HELAH TIADA BERKUNCI.

ALA EWAU EWAU BULAN WAU BULAN TERAAAAAAAAAAAAAAJU TIGA

Convincing

On your fucking 18th birthday, 22 Nov 2010, I fucking convinced myself that you won't leave. Nor will your hurt me. BUT WHAT THE FUCK, you hurt me on  31 Jan 2011. YOU LEFT AND I HAD TO BEAR THE FUCKING PAIN. WHY? COZ YOU STILL CAN'T FORGET THAT FAT WHORE OF AN EX YOU GOT.

Then 9 May 2011, you convinced me again that YOU WON'T HURT ME. NOR WILL YOU LEAVE ME. Fine, I accepted you back into my life. SEPTEMBER 2012 AND 9 DEC 2012 AND RECENTLY ALSO YOU FUCKING LEFT ME.

EH SIAL, KAU FIKIR AKU BAHAN PE? SIAL SIAL SIAL SIAL

DON'T FUCKING STOP ME FROM MOVING ON THIS TIME ROUND. 4 TIMES YOU LEFT, 4 TIMES I HAD TO CHASE YOU. THIS IS THE 5TH TIME YOU LEFT, NO WAY IN FUCKING HELL OR EARTH AM I GONNA CHASE YOU.

Kanina

It's so fucking hard to let go. It's fucking fucking hard to let go. APA SIA NI?
Aku nak lupa kan ni satu manusia peh SUSAH.
Like WHAT THE FUCK SERIOUSLT.

What's the fucking point of staying with me for two years plus then YOU FUCKING UP AND LEAVE?

I don't wanna be your best friend, nor do I wanna be your friend with benefit. I LOVE YOU, DAMN IT.

DO YOU NOT FUCKING KNOW HOW LONG IT TOOK ME TO FUCKING TELL YOU THAT I LOVE YOU? NO YOU FUCKING DON'T.
KANINA, FUCK THIS SHIT

He doesn't care

I don't think he cares anymore. I don't think he loves me. I don't believe that he misses me even when he tells me. Why?

This is just killing me )':

I just can't stop....

1) Crying.
            Can't stop crying. I want to be with him, but I don't want him to be unhappy.

2) Having negative thoughts
             Really, I can't. My mind just automatically has negative thoughts. It's hard to control. It's not fair )':
Why can't my mind have happy thoughts? WHY?

3) Loving him.
              No matter how much he hurt me, I can't stop loving him. I've tried to make myself hate him but it just doesn't work. At fucking all.

I JUST WANT TO BE HAPPY. I want to be Bitter Happiness or something.

I'll only love him )':

Tryna do the right thing,
Sweetened Misery.

Intro

Hi, I'm not gonna say what my name is but you'll just know me as Sweetened Misery.

I'm always sad but I make my life sweet by making others happy, coz I'm just awesome like that X')
So recently, I made the choice of moving on from my latest ex. He drained me mentally and emotionally and I just couldn't TAKE it. I couldn't handle it. I lied to him. I lied to him saying that we need time apart. I lied to him saying that by 20 May 2013, I'll have fully changed myself and be happy with him. The thing is, by 20 May, I plan to keep every memory we had together locked in a box somewhere in my mind and try to be happy. I don't want to be the source of his misery. I don't want him to be unhappy.

Starting from tomorrow, I won't be calling him by his nickname. I won't directly show that I miss him. I won't directly show that I love him. I will try to push those emotions back. Way way back.

"I guess you guys are just not meant to be. I know you guys have been together for a long time but maybe he's just in your life to teach you a lesson, that he's not meant to stay. Stay strong ok, god doesn't give someone something they cant face." - My Beloved Bbygee

My junior sent me that text. I guess it's true. I have to move on. No more texting him many times a day, maybe I'll limit myself to 10 texts for him per day, then maybe 5 texts per day. Then maybe to no text at all. 5 weeks from now, I won't bother him anymore. I'll still be in huge amounts of pain, but his happiness is what matters. His happiness is more important than mine.

I hope he'll understand. I'll miss him alot, I'll cry alot, I'll probably start to hurt myself but it's alright...

Tryna be happy,
Sweetened Misery.